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August 2008

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August 21, 2008

Life ....

"I don't think that life is short. So I think you should stop saying that. 'Life is short, man.' No it's not! Life is excruiatingly long. Let me rephrase that. The life you got left is excruciatingly long. The life behind you, it's done. So yeah, life is short, but only when you turn around and look at it. But if you keep looking forward, you got a lot of years to think about. If you don't think life is long, if you live every day like life is short, you know what you become? A fuckin' asshole. You gotta live your life like someday soon you're gonna hit some miserable Tuesday night that's just gonna seem to go on for days and days and days. Waiting for either some phone call to come that doesn't come or some phone call to stop that won't stop. Because as it's laid out infront of you seems to go on forever. But look back to when you were 4 and it seems like last Sunday. So just keep looking forward and keep your good heart on you and keep doing the best you can do and love who you love the best you can love." - John Mayer

I say....

Moving on....riding the roller coaster and trying to survive yet another storm .....
life is one big adventure...I'm just moving along.

                            

May 16, 2008

Expat Wife ???

What are the usual (public) perception towards an expat wife? Why do people mistook us as having a dull free, luxurious and easy life?
Are we really priviledged? What most of us (expat wives) really prefer?

Expat Wife

Definition : Married to a mobile husband who earns more than the average Joe back in your own country.  Living internationally, with  company allowances.  etc..etc...
Sounds good ey? Not!

Contrary to what everyone thinks (well most), we don't have an abnormal life. A life of luxury is only for rich people, rather, for people who were born with a silver spoon in their mouth. 
We struggle the same life like any normal wife, only, we are fighting the unknown. Being aliens in other countries is not an easy job. We may have little comforts like living in a better compound or buildings, having a helper and driver, sending kids to international schools. But the chances of having more advantage than disadvantage is not possible. We have problems of isolation, unfamiliarity, etc... etc... Imagine yourself stranded (for a couple of years) in an island far from civilization, then you'll understand where I'm coming from.

It's not that I'm whinning,I'm not!,I'm just stating facts. Sometimes I'm being too cynical, sometimes I feel so blessed with what I have, knowing that some people will kill for this life that I have. But then, there's this little devil at the back of your mind that never ceases an opportunity when it arise. Sometimes we prefer and hope to have a normal life back home.

Socializing was never been this hard back home with your long time friends. I used to love parties and in those days I am me. But now in some parties you have to be pretentious, in some a little stiff and in some just plain fake.  Makes you wonder why it's not easy to borrow a face like ...........                   Jenn

 

Yes I borrowed her face but only for this blog. This was taken before one of the cocktail parties. Justin took the photo but thought my face looked stressed out...so I pasted hers on mine. Neat eh? And yes it's my body .....duh! I just borrowed her face.

Note to self: Have to learn to accept I'm aging and not steal somebody else's face ...LOL!

This post was inspired by expatwomen.com and the book "Me, a TaiTai? Expatriates wife don't always have it good".

April 16, 2008

One organ less...

 After 8 months in Jakarta, few kilos lost (I’m barely 57 kilos), strands of hair pulled by gravitational force (according to Justin’s scientific terms meaning falling hair), a decreasing waistline and one size down for my bra .......... I am also one organ less. 

Yes, it’s the age that's getting me these days. When science tried to explain about the stages of life (cycle), it did not explain further that as you grow old you lose parts of your body. Well maybe it did, I was just not listening closely when it happened J

One week ago, I went through a laparoscopy procedure to remove my appendix. I woke up one Saturday morning with a slight tummy pain. I went straight to my usual routine for the weekend – prepare breakfast, eat ‘em, take a little walk around the house to check my garden. After the 5 minutes stroll, the pain came back and this time it’s excruciating. It was so severe that I have to lay down in a cramped position to minimize the pain. After a few hours of roller coaster pain attack, hubby have had enough watching me suffer. He said it doesn’t look like common food indigestion.

He drives to Gobal Doctor, which took an hour and a half because of that damn traffic jam. In the car he brought a pillow and a blanket so that I can lay down at the back. I was in so much pain, sweating profusely but I felt chills with the car aircon. When we arrive at the clinic they immediately took me to the observation room, put an IV drip, took urine sample, blood test and gave me a double dose of antacid. We waited for a couple of hours until the blood and urine test result came out. It was positive that I have some kind of infection and that the pain concentration is at the lower right of my tummy which identifies the appendix. The doctor then arrange for me to get admitted at the hospital (said to be the best one in the country) for further test and treatment. Again, another 1 hour and 45 minutes wasted in traffic for what is supposed to be just 25 minutes drive.

In the hospital they declared acute appendecitis only after a few minutes I arrive. Hubby was so nervous about the history of medical services in this country so he tried to ask for emergency evacuation from our insurance company to fly to Singapore. I was in pain but somehow excited to hear about the plan of flying me out of this city. At least, I said to myself, I will have a chance to get a break from this God forsaken place. Unfortunately, after an hour of negotiation and confirmation from doctors on both side they decided to keep me here to avoid the risk of my appendix rupturing while I’m being transferred. My husband held my hand tightly and hugged me, praying that everything will be fine.

Two hours later, I woke up with two slaps in my face. It was the attending nurse at the operating room trying to get my consciousness back as soon as possible. ‘Twas back so soon that I felt the slapping on my cheeks. After that, I noticed that I was shivering so bad, practically jerking my limbs up and down with my teeth gritting. I was suffering from hypothermia,so bad that I began screaming “I’m cold!” as loud as I can. Which is not much because I ain’t got no energy after 20 hrs. of no food. The last one was breakfast and they cut me at 3 a.m. til 4 a.m.. I looked around while I’m in that state and all I see is everyone busy with their own stuff while I’m there exposed in the cold practically naked (just the hospital robe). After 5 minutes I felt a warm air inside my robe and then they covered me up with what looks like an extra large thick bath towel. At that time I was already in tears because of rage and helplessness. It was traumatic and when I came out of the room I saw my husband but I couldn’t speak anymore. He said I was crying for almost an hour until I fell asleep.

I woke up few hours later and after I narrated the story to him, he almost cried. Then,I demanded for the surgeon to see me but he went home after the surgery and will be back later that day. The whole afternoon, I refuse to relate to any medical staff that comes to my room. When I finally saw the doctor, I told him the experience with tears rolling down my face. I recounted to him the first 2 times that I have undergone C-section in Matilda Hospital in  Hong Kong.
I insisted that I have the same reaction to the surgery which is the sudden drop of body temperature BUT I was fully covered with woolen blanket from beginning to end. Damn, there was even some sort of warmer socks. That the result of that neglect have caused me more pain specially in my upper back because of cold air trapped inside. He wanted to give more painkiller but I declined. I said all I wanted is a hot water bottle to help ease the pain. But guess what, there is no such thing in the hospital, no, nada, it doesn’t exist. He said he can send someone to buy me one but stores are already close. Damn!

Anyway, I am now a lesser person (one organ less) hehahaha!
I’m back on my feet, 'though I can’t yet carry my 18 kilograms  son, but I’m back gardening. It’s business as usual, Justin is back bugging me about his aquarium and the computer room, Pixel with her vanity and the two little ones with their day to day schedule of activities.Todays activities - gymboree and pony ride around the compound.

 

 

 

 

 

February 10, 2008

Mozilla FireFuxck%@#*&$%#!!!

I just finished updating my profile, when I stumble upon the blog opportunity in friendster. Here I am trying to finish my first blog when all of a sudden Mozilla FireFox just reset the page OH NO!!! I couldn't go back no matter how much I click the back button. More than 40 sentences, 3 paragraphs, lots of punctuations, emotions etc. etc ...is gone! kaput! Anyway, I just wanted to say that I went blank and lost some of the ideas that I wrote earlier. Have you experience those time when your brain is overflowing with thoughts and your fingers could not keep up with the typing ? It was like that. In 10 minutes, I have created 3 paragraphs with more than 40 sentences. Long enough to serve as a grand entrance for my blog. Sadly, it did not register in my brain. Great! Just Great. I am now trying to recompose and remember exactly how I wrote it. Maybe later...maybe tommorrow or next week. Who knows when can I have the time again. Maybe I need a break... let me go to sleep and we'll see if it works :)

Promise I will write again.